What’s Your Sign, Baby? 25 Tunes To Study Your Charts To

Once upon a time, about 15 years ago, a particular Sagittarius Sun, Scorpio Moon gifted me a massive Astrology Book for my 22nd Birthday. Realistically he used it as a passive aggressive gift to explain and excuse his horrible behaviors since, well, he “couldn’t help it, it was written in the stars!”

Realistically it wasn’t the first encounter I had with the 12 signs that line up with the times and seasons in life. My own grandmother, sick of Geminis (My mom, my Grandfather) hoped to Venus that I’d be a Taurus and prayed to the moon that I’d be a Cancer like her. I’ve spent plenty of time in my 30’s hanging out in weird Astrology social spaces, giving lectures, readings, and supporting the delusions of people with too many planets in Pisces while coining phrases like #astroshade and #venustakethewheel.

I’ve been around the wheel nearly 37 times, and look around at both the crass marketing of a practice that most cultures have had and also the extreme Eurocentric bantering on old world techniques of timing that served capitalist Empire building through Horary techniques. I could give a shit less about “Mars Out Of Bounds” or what my “Time Lord” for the year is, yet, there’s a nauseating number of (amazingly dull) white people that will talk to you for days while lining their pockets with your $1,500 weekend retreat fee or convince you that hanging out in some gawdawful Hotel Conference Room is a brilliant way to spend your time and money.

I think, realistically, looking to see arts of interpretation are always around you, and intersect with the past to inform the present so you can make less foolish future decisions are the name of the game (and a lot cheaper in late stage Capitalism). One place to look is decidedly Popular Music.

Astrology came on big in Pop Culture during the 2nd half of the 1960s, as people confused by the weird signs of the times looked to answers beyond the churches most usually found them. But we’d forever been referring to the Moon, the Sun, and Venus in particular to cast good fortune upon us. So I dug a bit further back from the hippie heyday when one’s birth chart might make the Pop chart, and provided plenty of Easter Eggs into my own chart with these 25 tunes that as we head into Gemini Season, are a message I’ll give to all of you.

Most of all, don’t take your astrology any more serious than any other really core belief. Just because you’re a Virtuous Virgo doesn’t mean you have any excuse to be an antagonizing asshole. Leos aren’t the only ones that want the stage (ask just about any Aries) and on and on….

…Just don’t meme yourself to death. And ask your mother for your birth time already!